The Edinburgh Festival Fringe may be over, but the awards season is still in full swing (well for us, and it’s definitely because we were too lazy to write anything at a more relevant time).
So here are the winners of the inaugural Lolly Awards (or Lollies), who all receive a trophy made from solid funny*. Well done guys. You are all special. Unless you didn’t win, then you’re a bit rubbish probably
Best use of the stage
To be honest it was a disappointing year for stages, most of them barely featured in the shows at all. The majority of them just had comics stand on them and tell jokes. However this was not the case for Tibetan Book Of The Dead, The Musical. No other show to our knowledge had the performer climb under the stage while it gave a stunning performance as the grim inevitablity of death.
Lots of contenders for this gong! Stu Goldsmith’s challenged critics to avoid using weak jokes in their reviews by reducing the money he would donate to charity every time they did; Nathan Cassidy gave every member of the audience at his free show a pound; Ben Target’s circular flyers with a picture of his face appeared in the men’s loos in the Underbelly in the urinals. (I’m not sure who did this, it was probably Ben himself).
But the winner is…. Craig Hill! Who had some posters up and paid someone to flyer.
Best stage prop
In a year of brilliant low-fi props like Adam Larter’s homemade bagpipes, Lou Sander’s magical entrance using a step ladder and Tony Law’s elephants, this was a closely contended category. But the winner is Matthew Highton’s dancing robot – a robot that danced to the Tetris music before the gig. What scooped it for Matthew was during his impression of Meatloaf strangling geese to death he set the robot off dancing. With was quite beautiful and haunting. Like a sexy ghost.
Best physical feat
It’s hard to erase the image of Thom Tuck putting his leg behind his head… as hard as I try. Well done.
Best physical feet
Dr Brown. What lovely feet.
Best overheard comment
While sitting in a pub, a free show started in the next room. Ten minutes into the hour most of the audience left. The only things we heard people say were “awful” and “why did he do that?!” We have the feeling we missed out.
Best matching outfits
Always a tough category, an honourable mention must go to Oyster Eyes (They should sell replica yellow turtle neck jumpers. I’d wear one). But this year’s winner is… Chris Ramsey! A surprising result that a solo stand up would win a category dominated by sketch acts. Well done the lad from Newcastle.
Dave’s best joke of the Fringe
“The star of family fortunes is to star in a film adaption of the Beano, but he is demanding a major rewrite of the script apparently he wants More Gnasher and Les Dennis (Less Denis)” – Our friend David (otherwise known as Dave).
Wettest hair, face and stage
During a Fringe of such glorious weather, it took a lot to make a mark in this category, but Holly Burn broke all records during a rather precarious ‘snake cup’ ritual that saw all regard for keeping water away from electrical wires go out the window.
Fastest land mammal
Once again, it was the cheetah. Well done cheetah.
Best five hour opera in German that Tom went to
It was a tough choice this year, with many shows to pick from, but, in the end, it could only be Wagner’s Tristan und Isolde, which definitely went on for five hours but was definitely not a mistake**.
Best use of a man who has been issued a fatwa as a punchline
Pattie Brewster made a friend in me with her reference to celebrity zealot botherer Salman Rushdie.
*Made from the bones of Bob Monkhouse
** It might have been a mistake